48 HOURS

I have been praying really hard, like nearly having an aneurysm kind of hard, that I will have some sense of direction for the immediate future on Thursday. I have decided that if God does not grant me any direction then I will just make some decisions and go on. At the moment I have nothing certain in my life, the last moment of certainty ended with my doctors appointment this morning. I have nothing left planned or secured for the coming days.

Everything seems to be hinging on whether or not I go to medical school. Even the summer. If I am not going to school then I could be looking for a full time job. All my attempts at summer jobs have failed, which is quite a contrast to last summer. Last summer I only applied for a few jobs and I got 2 within a couple of weeks. I have applied to I am sure almost 30 jobs in the last month and a bit this year and have got nothing. Tomorrow will be my last day of applying to jobs in Saskatoon and if I don't get anything then I will take that to mean that I am not supposed to be here for the summer.

If not Saskatoon, then what? I am still thinking of going to the summer linguistics/cross-cultural program in North Dakota (or BC), even though the finances are not there. Another option is just going back to Grande Prairie for the summer. Getting a job there should be no problem, and no matter what I do I will likely make more money than I will in Saskatoon.

I don't really want to leave Saskatoon, I feel like I have a lot invested here and that I still have some "unfinished business." I have a lot of friends that I want to see, and Saskatoon is a pretty central location that would allow me to travel to see them. I also want to go to bartending school (maybe even flair bartending), get a pilot license and try hitch-hiking, which I think would be safer in the prairies, with all the friendly farmers around.

So within the next 48 hours, I am praying and believing that God will guide me. I will hopefully have some answers to report Thursday night.